Saturday, March 24, 2007

Done and empty . . .

Well - here we are. The first day of "vacation". I turned in my last big project yesterday and I must admit, I slept good last night. However, today feels weird. Unsettled. I read for a bit, walked the dog, gave the dog a bath, cleaned the kitchen, mopped and did laundry. Yesterday, I snuck away for a 20 minute coffee break and wrote in my journal about how all my writing during the next week will be for fun only. No work.

I'm intending to use this time off to renew my spirit but I just feel so unsettled. Like an addict going through withdrawals. Isn't there a project I need to work on? An email I need to answer? If I was in therapy I'm sure there would be some sort of discussion about how I've been using work to avoid other things in my life. I need to get "clean".

So what to do? I'm at a bit of a loss. Relaxing doesn't come easy and there are still the voices of, "You really should be doing _________ ." (Fill in the blank with any number of mundane, non-vacation like activities.)

So I'm asking for prayers and advice. How do you refresh and renew your spirit?

7 comments:

Deb R said...

How about long, rambly walks? Reading something just for fun, not because you necessarily are trying to learn something from it? I think it's important to give yourself permission to play sometimes!

Michelle O'Neil said...

Long solo nature walks. Without the dog to focus on (sorry Fido).

Amber said...

Alone time. Alone time in the sun, even better. Alone time in the sun, by a body of water, even better!

Hey! know where there is sun and water? Northern California...(hint hint hint) ;)

xxxooo

:)

Kamsin said...

Hope you can shake that feeling and get some relaxing done. What do you like to do "just for fun", walk, bake cookies, eat cookies, go for a long coffee in your favorite coffee shop and people watch...? Whatever it is, we all need some down time and it sounds like you've been working hard and deserve a break.

Anonymous said...

I, too, often find it hard to 'get away' or 'relax', even when I am 'relaxing'. This is difficult, because of the 'need' to accomplish. But, remember our model -- he took time away. And even God rested on the 7th day! I do hope that you can find what your body and soul needs. I just read another blog, which gave me some good ideas. Check it out: http://tinkerart.typepad.com/tinker_art/2007/03/finding_water_w.html#more.

Angela Marie said...

I know exactly what you are talking about! When I experience this... I will watch old movies, listen to music while I work in my yard and that could be planting a couple of plants or rearranging things. I will also read quotes.

Trying to relax is like shifting gears.

Writer Bug said...

I hope you've already found a way to relax. I definitely have the same problem when I start a vacation, esp one where I don't go anywhere. I spend a lot of time reminding myself that doing nothing is my goal for the day!